"I want more bacon." - Dudley, 2
"You've forgotten the magic word. ... I meant 'please'!" - Harry, 2
"I'll be in my room, making no noise and pretending I'm not there." - Harry, 6
"You can't have met many decent wizards." - Harry, 14
"Dobby has heard of your greatness, sir, but of your goodness, Dobby never knew..." - Dobby, 15
"Friends who don't evern write to Harry Potter?" - Dobby, 18
"A lot of wizards think it's a waste of time, knowing this sort of Muggle trick, but we feel they''re skills worth learning, even if they are a bit slow." - Fred, 26
"THAT RUDDY OWL!" - Vernon, 27
"Mrs. Weasley was marching across the yard, scattering chickens, and for a short, plump, kind-faced woman, it was remarkable how much she looked like a saber-toothed tiger." - Rowling, 32
"Bless them, they'll go to any lengths to ignore magic, even if it's staring them in the face..." - Arthur, 38
"Did you really? Did it go all right? I - I mean, that - that was very wrong, boys - very wrong indeed..." - Arthur, 39
"This is the best house I've ever been in." - Harry, 41
"Fascinating! Ingenious, really, how many ways Muggles have found of getting along without magic." - Arthur, 42
"Really? Were there escapators?" - Arthur, 47
"But you're Muggles! We must have a drink! What's that you've got there? Oh, you're changing Muggle money. Molly, look!" - Arthur, 57
"We have a very different idea of what disgraces the name of wizard, Malfoy." - Arthur, 62
"Can you believe our luck? Of all the trees we could've hit, we had to get the one that hits back." - Ron, 76
"This wasn't the first time Snape had given Harry the impression of being able to read minds." - Rowling, 79
"Snape looked as though Christmas had been cancelled." - Rowling, 81
"Harry, Harry, Harry." - Lockhart, 90
"But when I was twelve, I was just as much of a nobody as you are now. In fact, I'd say I was even more of a nobody! I mean, a few people have heard of you, haven't they? All that business with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named! I know, I know - it's not quite as good as winning Witch Weekly's Most-Charming-Smile Award five times in a row, as I have - but it's a start, Harry, it's a start." - Lockhart, 91
"Let me just say that handing out signed pictures at this stage of your career isn't sensible - looks a tad bigheaded, Harry, to be frank. There may well come a time when, like me, you'll need to keep a stack handy wherever you go, but I don't think you'e quite there yet." - Lockhart, 98
"The last thing he needed was for Lockhart to hear the phrase 'Harry Potter fan club.'" - Rowling, 99
"Me." - Lockhart, 99
"I clearly state in chapter twelve that my ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non-magic peoples - though I wouldn't say no to a large bottle of Ogden's Old Firewhisky!" - Lockhart, 100
"I've got a question, Oliver. Why couldn't you have told us all this yesterday when we were awake?" - George, 108
"At least no one on the Gryffindor team had to buy their way in. They got in on pure talent." - Hermione, 112
"Can you hold him still, Harry?" - Colin, 113
"Harry, gotta bone ter pick with yeh. I've heard you've bin givin' out signed photos. How come I haven't got one?" - Hagrid, 116
"Said she was jus' lookin' round the grounds, but I reckon she was hopin' she might run inter someone else at my house. If yeh ask me, she wouldn't say no ter a signed - " - Hagrid, 118
"Half an inch of skin and sinew holding my neck on, Harry! Most people would think that's good and beheaded, but oh, no, it's not enough for Sir Properly Decapitated-Podmore." - Nearly Headless Nick, 124
"Why would anyone want to celebrate the day they died? Sounds dead depressing to me." - Ron, 130
"You've murdered my cat!" - Filch, 140
"Really, Severus. I see no reason to stop the boy playing Quidditch. This cat wasn't hit over the head with a broomstick." - McGonagall, 144
"Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world." - Ron, 145
"My life was nothing but misery at this place and now people come along ruining my death!" - Myrtle, 156
"D'you think we've got nothing better to do in Potions than listen to Snape?" - Ron, 159
"I never thought I'd see the day when you'd be persuading us to break rules." - Ron, 166
"This is all your fault. 'Get the Snitch or die trying,' what a stupid thing to tell him - " George, 170
"You read too much, Hermione." - Ron, 184
"Oh, Potter, you rotter, oh, what have you done,
You're killing off students, you think it's good fun - " - Peeves, 203
"Let's all throw books at Myrtle, because she can't feel it! Ten points if you can get it through her stomach! Fifty points if it goes through her head!" - Myrtle, 230
"If you'd wiped slime off a name for an hour, you'd remember it too." - Ron, 231
"And while Harry was sure he had never heard the name T. M. Riddle before, it still seemed to mean something to him, almost as though Riddle was a friend he'd had when he was very small, and had half-forgotten." - Rowling, 233-4
"Snape was looking as though the first person to ask him for a Love Potion would be force-fed poison." - Rowling, 236-7
"His eyes are as green as a fresh pickled toad,
His hair is as dark as a blackboard.
I wish he was mine, he's really divine,
The hero who conquered the Dark Lord." - singing dwarf, 238
"How many monsters d'you think this place can hold?" - Ron, 250
"The moment they start trying to move into each other's pots, we'll know they're fully mature." - Sprout, 251
"Play to your strengths, Harry." - Percy, 252
"Percy's in shock. That Ravenclaw girl - Penelope Clearwater - she's a prefect. I don't think he thought the monster would dare attack a prefect." - George, 258
"At this rate, there'll be no Muggle-borns left at Hogwarts, and we all know what an awful loss that would be to the school." - Lucius, 262
"You will find that I will only truly have left this school when none here are loyal to me. You will also find that help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it." - Dumbledore, 263-4
"If anyone wanted ter find out some stuff, all they'd have ter do would be ter follow the spiders. That'd lead 'em right! That's all I'm sayin'." - Hagrid, 264
"My sons and daughters do not harm Hagrid, on my command. But I cannot deny them fresh meat, when it wanders so willingly into our midst. Good-bye, friend of Hagrid." - Aragog, 279
"Ron gave a loud snort. Evidently, hatching Aragog in a cupboard wasn't his idea of being innocent." - Rowling, 281
"Professor McGonagall was still staring at him, and for a moment, Harry thought she was going to explode, but when she spoke, it was in a strangely croaky voice. 'Of course,' she said, and Harry, amazed, saw a tear glistening in her beady eye." - Rowling, 288
"Just the man. The very man. A girl has been snatched by the monster, Lockhart. Taken into the Chamber of Secrets itself. Your moment has come at last." - Snape, 294
"Myrtle's whole aspect changed at once. She looked as though she had never been asked such a flattering question." - Rowling, 299
"Voldemort is my past, present and future, Harry Potter..." Tom, 313
"You're dead, Harry Potter. Dead. Even Dumbledore's bird knows it. Do you see what he's doing, Potter? He's crying." - Tom, 321
"Hello. Odd sort of place, this, isn't it? Do you live here?" - Lockhart, 324
"Amazing! Amazing! This is just like magic!" - Lockhart, 325
"Oh, well... I'd just been thinking... if you had died, you'd have been welcome to share my toilet." - Myrtle, 326
"What have I always told you? Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain?" - Arthur, 329
"I seem to remember telling you both that I would have to expel you if you broke any more school rules. Which goes to show that the best of us must sometimes eat our words." - Dumbledore, 330-1
"First of all, Harry, I want to thank you. You must have shown me real loyalty down in the Chamber. Nothing but that could have called Fawkes to you." - Dumbledore, 332
"Voldemort put a bit of himself in me?" - Harry, 333
"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." - Dumbledore, 333
"Only a true Gryffindor could have pulled that out of the hat, Harry." - Dumbledore, 334
"We'll be needing a new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher... Dear me, we do seem to run through them, don't we?" - Dumbledore, 334
"Master has given a sock. Master gave it to Dobby." - Dobby, 338
"You shall not harm Harry Potter!" - Dobby, 338
"Just promise me never to try and save my life again." - Harry, 339
"'Wouldn't dream of it,' said Fred, who was looking like his birthday had come early." - Rowling, 341
"Proud? Are you crazy? All those times I could've died, and I didn't manage it? They'll be furious..." - Harry, 341
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2 comments:
This is a really funny book, isn't it? :-) Just reading through the quotes makes me laugh. So many great ones, and I think you captured all the really good ones!
I'm so glad you're doing this...this will be a great place to come back to when I need to find a quote quickly. :-)
I've made the decision that I would really love to own a copy of the UK published Philosopher's Stone. First editions are expensive, but you can easily find paperback reprints (the ones Bloomsbury did in 2000) for just a few dollars each. I'm putting a bug in Dana's ear (a Rita Skeeter like beetle?!) that I would really like to get such a copy for Christmas!
And I need a decent copy of Chamber of Secrets too. It's the only one of the series that I actually bought in mass market trade paperback, so it's a lot smaller than my other books and doesn't have all the inside art. I'm fond of this little paperback though, as that was the book I found (in an aisle of our local drugstore down the street, no less) that really got me hooked on Harry. I remember picking it up one day when I was very tired (Sarah was an infant) and thinking it would be nice to pick back up with Harry's story, since I'd read PS the year before. I took it home, started reading, and basically never stopped. :-)
I know, I was just thinking about how much humor she packed into this book. I'd say it's probably the funniest of the books, though HBP gives it a run for its money at times... But between Arthur, Lockhart and Myrtle, there sure is a lot of great stuff in CoS!
It would be really interesting to peek at the UK editions of these books, and probably especially the first one; I'm guessing as the books went on they changed less and less, and started giving American kids a little more credit... :-P
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